Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Choices

The other day Asher was being a pickle at the dinner table; just plain old disagreeable and miserable.  Since we try to offer the kids choices as much as possible, he got the typical dinner time response of, "happy or stairs?"  He has been hearing this since he was one year old and he knows the routine.  Usually he decides to cheer right up, but once in a while he thinks that sitting on the stairs sounds like more fun than eating whatever we are eating.  In that case we wave a happy good-bye and he grumpily walks himself to the stairs, sits there for a few minutes until he decides that we sound like we are having a lot more fun in the dining room than he is all by his lonesome on the stairs, and he decides to join us again and eat his dinner with a happy heart.

This day however it took him a lot longer to change his mind and after about 20 minutes I thought something was up.
Hmmm....I guess we should have said "happy or bed?" in this case. 

In all seriousness though offering choices has saved the day around here many times.  No more power struggles, yet you still retain your authority as the parent. 

We just finished up facilitating a parenting class with the videos based on the book "Loving Our Kids on Purpose".  While we still need to work on things ourselves we can not recommend this book enough, and those who went though the class found it enormously helpful and practical.  We feel like it is the best book we have found that really helps us show the heart of God to our children and be the type of parent that He is to us.

6 comments:

  1. That is the sweetest picture ever! That's great that you facilitated a class. I've had that book on my wish list at Paperback Swap for well over a year now. Maybe it's time to just break down and get it. You know some of the types of behavioral issues we deal with; do you think that the book would work with kids with special needs?

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  2. One of the families in the class has a son with special needs and they have been very surprised how well it works with him and he is pretty severe. The book was first written to help parents with foster children from a christian perspective because they were unable to spank and some of the parents did not know what to do with out that. It may not solve all your problems but I think it would certainly help!

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  3. Thanks, Christy. I know that no parenting book will solve all of our problems, but we'll take any help we can get! :)

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  4. That is such a cute picture. He must have been really tired. I am going to see if I can get that book for my grand daughter & husband. They are expecting again.

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  5. I love that book!!!!!! And how adorable! I often find that collin is most disagreeable if he is too hungry or over tired.

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  6. I am certainly more disagreeable if I am hungry and tired! It helps to remember that so I can offer more grace. :)

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